Dumb Jokes: Volume 1

Share your non-Elvis stuff here
User avatar

John
Posts: 13299
Joined: Sat Jan 24, 2015 6:36 pm
Has thanked: 2159 times
Been thanked: 3266 times

Re: Dumb Jokes: Volume 1

Postby John » Wed Jan 02, 2019 3:12 pm

goldbelt wrote:I got my girlfriend a fridge for Xmas

Her face lit up when she opened it.

Was she cool about it?

User avatar

Colin B
Posts: 15703
Joined: Sat Jan 24, 2015 6:35 pm
Location: Gravesend - UK
Has thanked: 2873 times
Been thanked: 3437 times

Re: Dumb Jokes: Volume 1

Postby Colin B » Wed Jan 02, 2019 4:05 pm

goldbelt wrote:I got my girlfriend a fridge for Xmas

Her face lit up when she opened it.
John wrote:Was she cool about it?


Yes, her face lit up at first, but later she gave him the cold shoulder...
Colin B

"Judge a man not by his answers but by his questions" - Voltaire
"Why ?" - Colin B

User avatar

goldbelt
Posts: 521
Joined: Mon Feb 01, 2016 8:19 pm
Has thanked: 295 times
Been thanked: 309 times

Re: Dumb Jokes: Volume 1

Postby goldbelt » Wed Jan 02, 2019 4:48 pm

John wrote:
goldbelt wrote:I got my girlfriend a fridge for Xmas

Her face lit up when she opened it.



Was she cool about it?



The fridge was cool, sure.

It was the matching freezer that was a little frostier.

User avatar

goldbelt
Posts: 521
Joined: Mon Feb 01, 2016 8:19 pm
Has thanked: 295 times
Been thanked: 309 times

Re: Dumb Jokes: Volume 1

Postby goldbelt » Wed Jan 02, 2019 4:51 pm

Colin B wrote:
goldbelt wrote:I got my girlfriend a fridge for Xmas

Her face lit up when she opened it.
John wrote:Was she cool about it?


Yes, her face lit up at first, but later she gave him the cold shoulder...




Only cause she kept the door open too long in admiration.

User avatar

Pacer
Posts: 1836
Joined: Mon Mar 19, 2018 7:13 pm
Location: nice try, fellas
Has thanked: 108 times
Been thanked: 490 times

Re: Dumb Jokes: Volume 1

Postby Pacer » Wed Jan 02, 2019 5:01 pm

All in one fridge or pieced over at least two?

User avatar

Topic author
When in Rome
Posts: 130
Joined: Wed Sep 26, 2018 11:13 pm
Has thanked: 105 times
Been thanked: 99 times

Re: Dumb Jokes: Volume 1

Postby When in Rome » Fri Jan 04, 2019 8:02 pm

Went to the zoo. There was only one dog in it! It was a shih tzu… ;)
It's far from being all over...

User avatar

TonyS
Posts: 4638
Joined: Sun Oct 02, 2016 9:23 pm
Has thanked: 2028 times
Been thanked: 2146 times

Re: Dumb Jokes: Volume 1

Postby TonyS » Sat Jan 05, 2019 8:08 am

In the garden of Eden Eve leans over to Adam and whispers in his ear and asks ....
'Do you love me?'





Adam replies ...'who else is there ?'
www.memphismansion.com
What a great place to visit, it really is.

User avatar

Topic author
When in Rome
Posts: 130
Joined: Wed Sep 26, 2018 11:13 pm
Has thanked: 105 times
Been thanked: 99 times

Re: Dumb Jokes: Volume 1

Postby When in Rome » Mon Jan 07, 2019 10:33 pm

Two Guys sat at a bar, nursing their favourite beers. Condensation forming on the bottles.
First Guy : Which do you think is worse, ignorance or indifference?
Second Guy : I don't know and furthermore, I don't even care...
It's far from being all over...

User avatar

TonyS
Posts: 4638
Joined: Sun Oct 02, 2016 9:23 pm
Has thanked: 2028 times
Been thanked: 2146 times

Re: Dumb Jokes: Volume 1

Postby TonyS » Mon Jan 07, 2019 11:00 pm

When in Rome wrote:Two Guys sat at a bar, nursing their favourite beers. Condensation forming on the bottles.
First Guy : Which do you think is worse, ignorance or indifference?
Second Guy : I don't know and furthermore, I don't even care...

:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:
www.memphismansion.com
What a great place to visit, it really is.

User avatar

Topic author
When in Rome
Posts: 130
Joined: Wed Sep 26, 2018 11:13 pm
Has thanked: 105 times
Been thanked: 99 times

Re: Dumb Jokes: Volume 1

Postby When in Rome » Tue Jan 08, 2019 9:32 am

In my last job I could take things real easy but the job I'm in now lock all their stuff up... :twisted:
It's far from being all over...

User avatar

Topic author
When in Rome
Posts: 130
Joined: Wed Sep 26, 2018 11:13 pm
Has thanked: 105 times
Been thanked: 99 times

Re: Dumb Jokes: Volume 1

Postby When in Rome » Tue Jan 08, 2019 9:35 am

I was rudely awakened this morning by some jerk blasting his car horn, in my defence I reckon the traffic lights had only just changed...
It's far from being all over...

User avatar

John
Posts: 13299
Joined: Sat Jan 24, 2015 6:36 pm
Has thanked: 2159 times
Been thanked: 3266 times

Re: Dumb Jokes: Volume 1

Postby John » Tue Jan 08, 2019 9:37 am

These are great, trouble is I can't remember any of them.


Mountain Mist
Posts: 12545
Joined: Mon Mar 07, 2016 11:06 pm
Has thanked: 8903 times
Been thanked: 7324 times

Re: Dumb Jokes: Volume 1

Postby Mountain Mist » Fri Jan 11, 2019 11:47 pm


User avatar

Colin B
Posts: 15703
Joined: Sat Jan 24, 2015 6:35 pm
Location: Gravesend - UK
Has thanked: 2873 times
Been thanked: 3437 times

Re: Dumb Jokes: Volume 1

Postby Colin B » Fri Jan 11, 2019 11:54 pm



Ha ha ha !

I reckon that's a mating ritual !
Colin B

"Judge a man not by his answers but by his questions" - Voltaire
"Why ?" - Colin B


Mountain Mist
Posts: 12545
Joined: Mon Mar 07, 2016 11:06 pm
Has thanked: 8903 times
Been thanked: 7324 times

Re: Dumb Jokes: Volume 1

Postby Mountain Mist » Sat Jan 12, 2019 12:06 am

Colin B wrote:


Ha ha ha !

I reckon that's a mating ritual !



:lol:


Well, so much to learn from animals (or, Amphibians in this case).


The different mating rituals, good, good.


Return to “Off Topic”

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 1 guest